I Am I Said

Oh what a beautiful day! Did you EVER think you would hear those words come out of my mouth or show up on this blog?

We went to breakfast. I worked at the office for a few hours. Then watched the Washington State University Cougars beat the University of Washington Huskies in the Apple Cup. Go Cougs!!!

As you can tell by the previous blog entry, this journey gets old. It's a trip I never asked to go on nor would I wish on my worst enemy. I never would have thought breast cancer for me. Lung cancer, maybe, given that cigarettes were my friends for 25 years. Thankfully, I have been smoke-free for 12 years!

The first chemo was hell and the lowest of lows. This past week has been a different kind of hell, but I still came out alive. Everything in this picture was affected this time by the chemo drugs. The chemo fog has increased and the ability to multi-task is decreasing as well as the ability to find the right words.

I strongly believe in taking Glutamine and other supplements to boost my system and repair the damage done by the chemo drugs. After the first chemo hell, I did a lot of research and brought this "plan" to the Oncologist for her blessing.

What is frustrating is that no one in the medical field offered any education on supplements and vitamins! Why not? When I brought the suggested list and the reasons why I wanted to use the supplements/vitamins to the oncologist, she agreed with my reasoning.

It is possible that I was not taking enough glutamine and thus the gastrointestinal attack. Before the 2nd chemo, I started taking 20-30 grams 3-5 days before and continued until I felt better. I don't believe I did this for the third chemo. Definitely will do it for the 4th! Here's more information about glutamine.

It was so nice to do something normal - going out for breakfast on the weekend. I didn't give a thought if the cooking smells were going to affect me. In fact, I sort of forgot about them! Doesn't mean I was able to taste all of the food, but I ate and the gut didn't revolt.

The restaurant is right across the street from my work. I felt good, the brain was pretty clear, so I worked a few hours on a project. My fellow breast cancer coworker arrived and it was good to see her. She has an 8 hour reconstruction surgery this Monday and it was great to give her a hug and wish her well. We've talked before about which one of us has it worse on the cancer journey and we each feel the other does. :-) I had a lumpectomy, chemo and will do radiation. She had a mastectomy, no chemo or radiation, and now reconstruction.

Cancer is a wake up call to take a look at your life. It's like any other major catastrophic life event, you promise yourself that you'll make changes. How many of us keep those changes - make them a habit?

I guess I'm a little reflective right now as we head into another "unknown" situation with Vic. Almost deja vu. What did I tell myself I would change in my life during Vic's adrenal gland tumor/cancer this summer, but haven't? What can I do to make these changes a habit? Or is this something to keep as a goal once treatment (chemo and radiation) is over?

Whatever the answers are, I need to remember this: I am Renee. I am not Cancer.



Peace and blessings to you!

~Renee